Friday, February 8, 2013

Single Ladies Bread Pudding

It's that time of year again, kittens. 

The time of year where you get squashed into a crevice on the train 
surrounded by couples of all shapes and sizes, batting eyelashes at each other shamelessly in public
and whispering sweet nothings in each others ears and pecking each other every 
other blink. 

Everything is pink and red, the national colors of self loathing among the single community. 

Your facebook newsfeed is flooded with memes about loneliness and
defiant statuses about how this day is crap and
yadda yadda Alanis Morrissette quotes yadda yadda

Come on, folks. 

We can do better than this. 
Really, we can. 
If you don't believe me,
bacon roses. 

On board now?
Thought so.

This recipe yields a breakfast bread pudding fit for one.
One independent woman or man, 
who happens to enjoy a solitary breakfast as any proper human should, 
and also happens to have a hunk of baguette leftover from
the other night when they were tearfully gnawing on it 
while watching the Sleepless in Seattle. 

Since that definitely applies to you, i'll go on. 

Light some scented candles. 
Read the newspaper.
Make yourself a heart shaped egg. 
Stab the yolk like you're in the opening sequence of Dexter, 
pretending it is the metaphorical heart of some jerk who has wronged you. 
Or don't because you're definitely over it and stuff like that. 

Twirl yourself up some bacon roses.

Sit and breathe in the coffee air and let carbohydrates and animal fats remind you 
how much they love you. 

You work hard. You deserve it.

This playlist is chock full of womanly sass and independence to take 
you from cooking to crumbs.

Enjoy, babes!


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