Thursday, July 3, 2014

Mexican Street Corn




Sometimes life is not very zesty.
You fall asleep at 10:30 on a Friday night watching
 Abraham Lincoln vampire hunter on TV.
You get stuck talking to ladies in khaki shorts at the park
who think your nanny kids are your kids
about how her grad school friends "kind of" have a book club.
You might be that person reading murder
history novels at the bar alone sometimes.

When life's got you feeling like a pair of khaki shorts, 
you have to seek the curative powers of hispanic food.
In this case, the gorgeous creation that is 
Mexican street corn. 








Soak the corn in water before grilling.
Once the husks look nice n blackened up, 
peel those babies back and begin the madness.

Traditional Elote is dipped in butter then spread with mayonnaise 
before adding this cheese, herbs and spice.
That felt good in theory, but a little intense in practice.
So, I decided to make make a few of these guys combine forces
with this herb aioli spread.

Yield-Enough for about 10 cobs of corn

2 egg yolks
1 tbsp white vinegar
1/3 cup fresh cilantro 
1 tbsp. cumin
1 lime, juice and zested
Vegetable oil to thicken
Salt & pepper to taste

Combine the egg yolks, vinegar, cilantro, lime juice, and cumin in a blender.
Blend on low while slowly drizzling in the oil.
Once it is to your preference of thickness, add S&P to taste.

Spread the Aioli on the corn, sprinkle with Cotija cheese,
cayenne pepper, and chopped cilantro.







Until the next, babes.



                                               

Monday, June 30, 2014

Boozy Frozen Watermelon




There are occasions that call for your feelings to be eaten. 
Such as when it's your day off and there are too many 
people logged in to your Netflix
account and it won't let you watch.

There are also occasions where you need to soak
your feelings in booze and then eat them.
Such as when the cashier at the grocery store tells you that
you're never going to get a husband if your grocery habits
 entail only buying tequila and watermelon.

Would you believe that this is the second time I've been told I'm never going
to get a husband for something that i've done at that grocery store?
Second time.








Whether you're in the business of eating feelings
 or trying to earn your "most creative use of alcohol" sorority girl merit badge,
 these are easy and delightful.
All you gotta do is soak the watermelon for 30 minutes and freeze overnight.







Once frozen, dip the ends in salt or sugar and have at it.
And *bonus!* You can chop it up and blend it
with the extra tequila and it makes 
a splendid watermelon slushie.
Look at that! Double merit badges.





Until the next my dears. 
Keep cool out there.






Wednesday, June 11, 2014

Dutch Baby





Today I applied for a big girl job that
held out it's fancy, sophisticated hand and said "LinkedIn Profile?"
My hands got a little sweaty. 
My knees buckled a little.
I can accomplish this, no problem.
But I began having awake-nightmares about being one of those
people who sends 1000 emails inviting everybody to 
"Join me on LinkedIn!"
It wouldn't happen to me. I had this. 

Things were going so smoothly, my confidence was sitting on a golden tuffet.
Then, I noticed a little circle on the side of the page.
Mine was filled just a tiny bit to a level deemed "poor" or "beginner" or "wussy"
I can't remember. I've blocked it from my memory. 
"Add connections!" it tells me. 
I press the button. I press all the buttons. I press them three times 
because it doesn't appear to be working.

It was that moment that I became my fear. 
I was an ashamed and accidental over-indulgent LinkedIn inviter.

It was the same sinking feeling as
having to walk through the perfume department to get to the escalator
or giving up your pizza crusts when
 you really were about to eat them.

I felt like zero dollars. 
To cheer myself up, Dutch baby.










3 large eggs

2/3 c. whole milk

2/3 c. all-purpose flour

1/2 tsp. cinnamon

1/8 tsp. salt

3 tbsp butter.


Preheat your oven to 425 degrees. The Fahrenheit kind. 
Tickle your eggs with an electric mixer for 4-ish minutes until they are frothy.
Slowly mix in the rest of the nonsense, except for the butter.

Melt the butter in a 10 in. cast iron skillet and swirl it around until it covers the whole surface.
Pour mixture into the buttered skillet and bake for 18-20 minutes.

Your Dutch baby will emerge fluffy and excited...
for approximately one minute.
Then it will lay down and submit to the bath of 
fresh fruit, chocolate sauce, powdered sugar, or ice cream that you
have in store for it.






Until the next kiddies!





                                               

Friday, June 6, 2014

Thai Coconut Soup




Soup is a great best friend. 

It always wants to hangout with you.
It's down to hop in a thermos and go on a walk
or sit through a shameful amount of gossip girl on the couch.
If you get sick of it, it'll hangout in the freezer
until you're ready to be friends again.
Soup will even do you a solid and spill a little on your shirt
every once in a while to keep your ego in check. 

Soups got your back.

This thai coconut soup and I have been hanging out a lot lately. 
Like "i'd put him on my Myspace top 8" a lot.
It's super creamy and flavorful without being gluttonous 
and it makes you feel flossy even
though it hardly costs anything.




1/2 stalk lemongrass
1 tbsp red curry paste
1 lime, zest & juice
1 small white onion
2 cans coconut milk
1 1/2 c. vegetable stock
1/2  of a red bell pepper, thinly sliced.

cilantro, bean sprouts, and jalapeno for garnish.

Blend the onion, lemongrass, curry, lime juice and zest in a food processor or blender.
Fry the paste in a tablespoon of oil for a minute on medium heat, stirring constantly.
add the bell pepper, coconut milk and vegetable stock and whisk everything together.
Simmer for 10-15 minutes and add salt and pepper to your liking. 

Fill a bowl. Top with some shrimp or tofu or tears of joy.




             


                                                                  Until the next, dears!



                                              

Wednesday, May 7, 2014

New York City

                



New Yawk.
I heard that it was a concrete jungle that dreams are made of.

If your dreams are as lofty as seeing the naked singing cowboy
or peeing in the stall next to Alicia Keys,
then that isn't true. 

However, if your dreams are eating pizza 3 times a day
and passing a million cello players on your way
to everything, then it's true.
New York City is made of those dreams.

Since this city fulfilled a solid 50% of my dreams,
I am left with a sunny enough disposition to share with you
my favorite parts of it. 






1. Smorgasburg

Smorgasburg is a "Food Flea Market" located in Brooklyn. 
It posts up in two different locations each Saturday and Sunday to overwhelm
locals with tremendous amounts of delicious food.

Highlights -A Jon Bon Jovi themed Anchovy stand.
-A Rueben sandwich in dumpling form.
- Bacon cut as thick as a thesaurus and grilled with an amazing sweet glaze.
- Indain. Food. Tacos. 















2. The Highline Aerial Park

The Highline is an old elevated train track turned into a long stretch of park. 
The old tracks are over run with tulips, flowering trees and shrubs
and the mile long stretch of walkway is scattered with 
musicians, smiling babies eating popsicles, and beautiful arial views of the city.









3. The Met Roof

While we completely dropped the ball and forgot to buy yogurt
to eat on the Met steps like in Gossip Girl, 
we did remember to take a peak at the rooftop garden.
It was one of my first sights of the New York skyline, and being up
there as the sun was sinking, drinking an over-priced beer with a bunch 
of yuppies from all over the world 
was pretty spectacular. 









4. Pizza

Pizza was everywhere. All day. Forever. 









And everything else. That was my favorite part too. 














And for your listening pleasure, here is a playlist of adventure-y
happy songs that remind me of the trip. 

Until the next, babes.


                                              

Monday, April 28, 2014

Spring Vegetable Croque Madame




Croque Madame.
Loosely translates to "Crunchy Lady."
Which is quite fitting, because that is what I feel like these days.

The quarter life crisis is real, people.
College is over.
 You're in a land of pseudo-adulthood where
you own dishes that aren't plastic 
and could probably tie a tie if you had to,
but you still eat boxed macaroni and cheese for breakfast sometimes.

This is a land where nobody wants to give you a big girl job,
so you stalk companies and write cover letters
for hours and days
like a pathetic loser relentlessly trying to appeal to an unrequited love
until the universe has sucked the entirety of your soul out
with one of those straws you used to
get when you bought a lot of Nesquik.

And every time you go to work you're asked
"So any jobs yet?" "How is the job hunt coming?" "So, what's your plan?"

Plan? My plan is to hit every person in the head
 with an oversized cartoon hammer.

And then go eat snacks. 
Because I'm a grown ass adult with a plan.








While all of your enemies are spinning in circles with cartoon birds
around their heads,
you should turn on your oven. 
350 degrees. 
Throw some asparagus and green onions in the broiler 
to get a little color.
Brush the bottom of a lovely slice of bread with some olive oil and layer it
with gruyere cheese, ham (or your preferred pork product,)
and your roasty vegetables.
Throw a fried egg on it.
Stab it a couple times. 
You'll feel better. 








What goes great with Crunchy lady sammiches?
Beet Chips! Sort of like Kale chips except that they are delicious and
not so disgusting that you want to die.


Until the next, crunchy ladies and misters.




                                            

Monday, February 24, 2014

Lemon Olive Oil Cake



Cake with no butter in it?
Yuppie ice cream flavored like trees?

My casserole loving, meat and potatoes, $3 gallon tub of vanilla family
would probably excommunicate me if they knew
of these unthinkable acts of treason that I was engaging in. 

But from the moment I read "Oregon Fir" on the flavors list at
Jeni's Splendid Ice Cream, I knew I was in for trouble.

The hardly sweet ice cream sings a happy little song about rosemary
on your tongue and makes you want the savory/sweet parade 
to last forever. Lemon olive oil cakes, this is where you come in. 

















The cakes are dense and just a touch sweet, making them the perfect
candidates to hold down this pine ice cream fort. 
Sprinkle it with some praline pistachios, drizzle it with some honey.

You're going to be so happy that you'll
almost forget that you're turning into a yuppie. 















Ingredients:
1 c. flour
zest of 1 lemon
juice of 1/2 lemon
3/4 c. extra virgin olive oil
5 egg yolks
4 egg whites
3/4 c. white sugar
1/2 tsp. salt

-Beat egg whites, 1/4 c. sugar and salt until they form soft peaks.

-Beat egg yolks and 1/2 c. sugar in a different bowl 
until the mixture becomes a thick, pale yellow. 
-Add the lemon juice and zest and slowly add the olive oil while
mixing.

-Gently fold in the flour to the egg yolk mixture, then once thoroughly mixed,
fold in the egg white mixture. 

Bake at 350 degrees in a greased pan/tins until 
a toothpick inserted comes out clean. 






                                           





Until the next, dears.